Sometime, about a year ago, I suddenly started hating the tube. 2 minutes at a signal and I am freaking out.

To take my mind off things I begun writing lists, each inspired by my journey on the underground.

Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Life Lessons

  • High necklines + big boobs = no go.
  • When men are with men all they are thinking about is being there with other men.
  • Nothing good happens after 2 am.
  • Eating chicken and eggs together is wrong.
  • Fish 'n Chips. Better in principle that reality.
  • Every pair of sunglassses eventually gets lost.
  • Cats sense hatred.
  • You can never own too many condiments.
  • Nights you look forward to always disappoint. Nights you dread often come up trumps.
  • Change is as good as the rest.
  • If you haven't read Harry Potter now you, you are never going to.
  • Better to be a mug than be tight.
  • The hottest people at school become the most jaded/fattest adults. Early success with the opposite sex is there undoing.
  • Simple pleasures can't be beat. Eating. Sleeping. Cleaning teeth. Having a shower. Going for a Pooh.
  • That third glass of wine always comes back to bite you.
  • Don't wear tights when going clothes shopping.
  • Always carry a brolly in England. Even a beautiful day can end up torrential.
  • Red heads should never dye their hair black.
  • Do not persist with a fluffy apples.

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