Amusing Tube Behaviour

• Waiting till someones out of sight  before picking up their discarded paper. 
• Pressing the open button repeatedly to encourage it to work.
• Jogging at the bottom of the escalator 'just in case' the tube is there.
• Seat smugness.
• 'Microshuffling'. Moving 3mm down the carriage makes no difference.
• Hating someone with all your soul because they're nudging with a backpack/ flapping a paper in your face.
• 'Commute companions'. People you see everyday that you invent an entire imagined life for.
• Extreme panic on thinking you've passed your stop. 
• The Not So Cool Now Kid. Full of attitude, but oblivious to the fact we can hear the power ballad he's listening to.
• The Houdini - taking you coat off whist sardined against other people. 
• The inability to stop watching someone putting their makeup on.
• Escalator spin-out.  You step on knowing it isn't working, your brain doesn't believe you.