Sometime, about a year ago, I suddenly started hating the tube. 2 minutes at a signal and I am freaking out.

To take my mind off things I begun writing lists, each inspired by my journey on the underground.

Monday, 28 November 2011

Worst Bits About Xfactor

  • Daft 'hello' gestures. Who in real life puts their arm up or salutes. A wave is fine.
  • Female judges wearing heels so high they have to cling to one another to get down the stairs.
  • Swirly camera work. Television equivalent of the waltzers.
  • The expression 'nailed it'.
  • Kitty.
  • Judges standing up after their acts perform. Sit down.
  • Not being able to decide whether Caroline Flack is fit or not.
  • Smugness of previous contestants who come back to perform a year later. Like going into school after you've left.
  • Leaving with the guilt of knowing I was once mean about Jessie, Poor girl.
  • The 'back-story'. Just get up there and sing...
  • The quality of Louis Walsh's dye job.
  • Louis' loves of boy band.
  • When anyone uses that bit of stage that goes round behind the judge. AWKWARD.
  • Sinita.
  • Kelly says 'Momma' or 'putting it down'.
  • Kelly's moving beauty-spot.
  • Telling contestant 'you're already a star'. No your not, come march no one will know who you are.
  • Gary's lack of sense of humour.
  • Feeling dirty for liking One Direction.
  • Amelie Lilies half-closed eyes. Remove the falsies.
  • Thanks for opportunity. How about taking the opportunity to say something original?
  • Realising you'd be in the 'over 25's. The Raggy Dolls of Music.
  • 80% of the styling.
  • Devlin's heart of stone.

1 comment:

  1. I hate the fact that it exists. I can't bear it. And I really hate the Rags To Riches music video the winner always makes, and the fact that you can hear Dermot announce the winning name when the song does the uptempo key change. It happens in every single video!!!